Public speaking, presentation, and communication coaching and training for professionals and businesses

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CLASS ANNOUNCMENT: Registration for the Winter 2015 Group Class Public Speaking for Beginners and the Truly Terrified is OPEN!

This year I am running two classes of my 8 session public speaking course. This challenging fun, intensive course will enable you to overcome your anxiety, unleash your voice, and create presentations that will capture your audience's attention.

The Tuesday class meets every two weeks from January 26 to April 26, and the Wednesday class meets every two weeks from January 20 to April 20.

Make 2016 the year you finally become the speaker you need to be! Register online now!

Click here to register for the TUESDAY class

Click here to register for the WEDNESDAY class

Full course descriptions are on the registration pages. You can also contact me at 780-966-2401 to register over the phone.

Have questions? Call me at 780-966-2401. I'm happy to discuss your speaking goals and class details!


Lauren's Blog

Thoughts, insights and ramblings on communication, public speaking, and what makes our work and businesses tick


Confidence Isn’t Dominance

Confidence Isn’t Dominance

This post is an excerpt from a project I’m currently working on: The Little Book of Big Confidence

 

Photo credit: USFWS Pacific Southwest Region via Visualhunt.com / CC BY

 

Here’s a pernicious myth about confidence:  Confident people are dominant.

Utter hogwash.

It’s easy to think that dominance indicates confidence. After all, people who speak louder than others, or take up all the space, or control the conversation do come across as being pretty sure of themselves. But while dominant or bold behavior might indicate confidence in some people, it certainly doesn’t do so for all people.

 

Bullies show plenty of dominant behavior, yet bullies often hold deep seated insecurities and very a very shaky sense of self-worth.

 

Some people who try to dominate a conversation or an audience are putting on a show of bravado as a way of compensating for gut-wrenching fear.

 

CLICK TO TWEET: Dominating a conversation or audience could be compensation for fear.

 

And sometimes dominant behavior is fueled by other emotions, like anger or exasperation – two feelings that probably don’t factor into most people’s concept of confidence.

 

For women, dominant behavior is even more divorced from confidence. When we’re establishing our positions within a group – or establishing our authority as speakers – we tend to look for common ground, to connecting with one another, or to use other, subtler social signals to signal our role within the room. This isn’t to say that no woman uses dominance to establish her position – we’ve all encountered queen bees or battleaxes who seek to dominate in a group. There are also many outstanding women leaders who have more dominant personalities and who use their dominant traits both respectfully and effectively. But by and large, we women are less likely to use dominant behavior to indicate confidence.

You absolutely do not need to be dominant in your personality or in your behavior to be a confident presenter. Even though you might be in the spotlight persuading people to take a certain action or vigorously defending your choice or viewpoint, you don’t need to dominate your audience to persuade, to lead, to inspire trust, or to feel completely comfortable owning your position at the front of the room.

News, Developments, and Upcoming Talks/Events

  • See me in action at Nerd Nite November 26 at the Citadel Theatre in Edmonton, AB! How To Lose Friends and Manipulate People: The Fine Art of Bamboozlement (title may change depending on my caprice). Click here for ticket information and to learn more about Nerd Nite.
  • Currently in development - my online digital course "Masterpiece Presentations: Your step-by-step method for creating high-impact presentations"


Category Archives: Confidence

Confidence Isn’t Dominance

Confidence Isn’t Dominance

This post is an excerpt from a project I’m currently working on: The Little Book of Big Confidence

 

Photo credit: USFWS Pacific Southwest Region via Visualhunt.com / CC BY

 

Here’s a pernicious myth about confidence:  Confident people are dominant.

Utter hogwash.

It’s easy to think that dominance indicates confidence. After all, people who speak louder than others, or take up all the space, or control the conversation do come across as being pretty sure of themselves. But while dominant or bold behavior might indicate confidence in some people, it certainly doesn’t do so for all people.

 

Bullies show plenty of dominant behavior, yet bullies often hold deep seated insecurities and very a very shaky sense of self-worth.

 

Some people who try to dominate a conversation or an audience are putting on a show of bravado as a way of compensating for gut-wrenching fear.

 

CLICK TO TWEET: Dominating a conversation or audience could be compensation for fear.

 

And sometimes dominant behavior is fueled by other emotions, like anger or exasperation – two feelings that probably don’t factor into most people’s concept of confidence.

 

For women, dominant behavior is even more divorced from confidence. When we’re establishing our positions within a group – or establishing our authority as speakers – we tend to look for common ground, to connecting with one another, or to use other, subtler social signals to signal our role within the room. This isn’t to say that no woman uses dominance to establish her position – we’ve all encountered queen bees or battleaxes who seek to dominate in a group. There are also many outstanding women leaders who have more dominant personalities and who use their dominant traits both respectfully and effectively. But by and large, we women are less likely to use dominant behavior to indicate confidence.

You absolutely do not need to be dominant in your personality or in your behavior to be a confident presenter. Even though you might be in the spotlight persuading people to take a certain action or vigorously defending your choice or viewpoint, you don’t need to dominate your audience to persuade, to lead, to inspire trust, or to feel completely comfortable owning your position at the front of the room.

How do you define confidence?

How do you define confidence?

Confidence is a subject I get asked about a lot. I’m currently working on a mini-book about that very topic – this blog post is an excerpt from the book draft.   Nearly everybody I work with believes that confidence is something other people have and they do not. When they try to define confidence,… Continue Reading

Your secret weapon: Power up!

Your secret weapon: Power up!

  Bet you thought I’d be going over the presidential inauguration speeches, eh? Not today! I’ll do a post about it later, as there was some interesting stuff going on. I was live tweeting during the inauguration, though – click here to see my in-the-moment thoughts regarding the rhetoric. Check my tweets from January 20th.   Communication… Continue Reading

Spending more time worrying about your speech than working on it?
Sign up for my newsletter and get a free download for strategies and techniques to vanquish your nervousness! Plus, you'll get my latest articles and announcements I only send by email.
I pledge to be 100% spam-free. You can unsubscribe at any time.